Falling Back Into ...

...Anonymity

Oh! How the days seemed so vibrant and luminous in the days of yore. How the title of this blog needs to be switched, as no longer am I falling from anonymity as I once was, but instead regressing back to my state of falling into it once more. It is not that this truly bothers me to the point where I cannot go forward with my life, as I am a strong enough individual to know my own self-worth, however, to never be acknowledged does also take a toll on the human body and ego.

I am aware that my physical attractiveness will never be able to grace a "highly acclaimed" beauty magazine, where even though you are not even looking at the magazine rack the front cover model it catches your eye while you knee deep in Aisle 14-- Cookies and Chips. However, I am also aware I am not ugly either, but basically all of these are subjective terms used to basically inflate or debase the egos of those around us and give money guzzling companies canvases in which they can display their products for consumers to masturbate over in their bedrooms at night. I will not be that person that everyone unanimously thinks is so gorgeous, but I'm okay with that. However, I am overshadowed to the point where not only is my outward appearance being deflected into the black hole of social outcasts, but apparently I no longer am given the time of day to speak without my words also being deflected into, let's arbitrarily name it, the seventeenth dimension. I am confident enough to know that what I say has value, but from the looks of society it seems the ones that ramble on about absolutely nothing and boast about themselves are given the most attention. Furthermore, there are other random characteristics which seem to be predetermined in peoples mind that if you do not have from the beginning, they tend to simply write you off. Since when did this need to have erratic traits ever exist for someone to listen to someone else? It is as if I am not Canadian, I cannot speak about the Toronto Maple Leafs. Don't dismiss me based off of nonsense. Society has shaped us like the clay to harden into a hallow outer shell. It is something I guess I need to start getting used to...

I do wish to stress it is not that I want to be the center of attention, I just want acknowledgment of my existence. Because as I started this post as ... it feels like I am falling straight back into anonymity...